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Dr. Eleanor Johnson
Psychologist, specialized in group analysis psychotherapy. Manages and performs Counselling and Consulting at public and private institutions.
She also offers advisory services, diagnosis and psychotherapy to individuals, couples and families.

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Trusting again
Dear psychologist,
I'm Vanessa, I'm a 50 year old who has collected many reports disappointing so far, I have wounded and embittered. In a new meeting I am therefore often build walls, build fortifications, afraid to let go and be once again wound and "abandoned ".
How can I regain the trust and want to jump into a new report, without many fears and defenses?
I answered
Where and how to find the desire to thrown back into a new story, relying again to those sensations that make us vibrate the right chord that we know well? How to trust those feelings, without trying to restrain or restrict them for fear of suffering? How to find and reconstruct that space unsaturated expectations, mostly disappointing and sources of suffering?
The disappointment can sometimes be passed that made us dry, not willing to lose in the game, believe that people hurt themselves and we abandon, once "robbed " something of ourselves. In fact they are hurting relationships, what we have created and that we help to create together with the other person. Often it seems that there are people to transform, to become a "bad " and hurt us consciously and deliberately. With a few exceptions, I think that often they are mostly relationships become when you lose sight of the other person and sees in it only the person that we would like it to be, that is the one who should answer all our desire and need , meeting inevitably to disappointment compared to a lack predictable.
The desire to speak of, to "go " in a new relationship, is derived from the need to have at his side a person to trust and be trusted, is the need to build unity, the 'entirety with the other, to find the person that there complete. The search for a person by his side he founded the foundation in need of everyone to love and be loved, to give and receive care, treatment and listening. My advice is to trust most of your feelings and emotions. Being more aware of what was in your past relationships, you will also guide in understanding how you could trust in future reports.

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